But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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