dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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