Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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