I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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