I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
My feet surprised me
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