Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
