If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Randomize
