I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
