drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
He's on the porch naked. Help.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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