dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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