you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
There r osticjed everywhere
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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