He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
