So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Randomize
