she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
