So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize