I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You were trust falling into bushes
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize
