whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
