You're so nebulous sometimes
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
