last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize
