I think scott just propositioned me for sex
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
