i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I still have a little drunk in my system
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
