There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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