did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
