After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
