so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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