i don't plan on having that self control this summer
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
