so explain again why im purple
no
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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