Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
