You made me cry and you don't even care
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
