please come you make the beer taste better
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
