just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Randomize
