Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
