I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
