you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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