Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
