I think scott just propositioned me for sex
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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