somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
He did a backflip because drugs
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