Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
