Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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