How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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