in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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