i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
