I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
