You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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