If i come over, it means nothing
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
