I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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