i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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