Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
YAS. BRING CRAB.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
