Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Randomize
