Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
